memories

I am juz done with my 2nd newsletter.
I'm still not sleepy coz i slept when i got back from the centre.
I so miss my beautiful sleep.

Without realising it, i only have one more day at the centre.
I made it to the end.Without falling.
I didnt know i was this strong.
Alhamdulillah.

I still remember complaining about quitting school when in year 2.
*winks at ulfy*
I still remember those sleepless nights getting assignments done.
I miss AURA.
I miss making those sounds with the straw in MSS and ended up missing prayers.
I miss doing assignments at canteen 2 and laugh till we cried when she fell.
*winks at annisha*
I miss taking the big green lorry to school with all our learning centre's materials.
*winks at all my meanies*

Can you believe it?
I'm graduating next april.
Insya-Allah.
But if i had a choice, i wouldnt want to...

I will miss waking up late and skipping lectures.
I will miss getting those warning letters.
I will miss picnic-king in class.
I will miss taking cabs to school.
I will miss running up to class to hand in assignments.
I will miss SIM.
I will miss borrowing books and buying bubble tea at the library.
I will miss getting all nervous when walkin through the sensor at library.
I will miss looking at boys. heh.
I will miss running at the tracks.
I will miss carrying the goalposts for floorball trainings...
and the list goes on.

I will miss everything.
Most of all, i will miss the places which holds so much memories of us.

Hmmm...thinking about all these gets me down. I always spent time thinking about my friendship.Will it last? Is it strong enough to last? Or would it just be gone when everyone goes on their separate ways?Just like what happen to my sec sch mates.
I will miss you, my meanies.

------------------------------------

Floorball's the way.
All the way, Floorball.

Friendly with SP tmr at 10am.
Pesta Sukan - Squirettes vs UWC
Tuesday, 30/08, 7pm.

--------------------------------

I have been doing alot of shopping lately.
I am becoming so like ibu.
We'll go crazy at the sight of shoes and bags.
Told ibu: Ibu, nanti girl kerja, hari2 cari kasut dengan beg.
Like mother, Like daughter.
This was what i bought for myself...

a $35 charles & keith shoes


a $19.90 sandals @ Metro *winks at ulfy*


a $25+ adidas handbag (which i wanted for so long)

your presence still lingers

2 am.
and i'm still awake.

Thinking about you.
About us.

him: can feel some part of me is still there

Well, i think so too.

But i'm sorry.

I thought u have left.
Leaving with that piece of me still safe with u.

smileys

Alhamdulillah.
I passed my assessment by my field supervisor.
Nice lady.Very chatty.
She said i had warm and positive voice. She could see that the children were very attached and comfortable with me. *winks*
I'm so so happy it's over.
one more assessment by my mentor.
talking about her, i n vic were so surprised by her friendliness the other day.
wad's got into her?
phew!
now i can really have all my heart in floorball.
niwaes lets just let the pics do the talking.

At padang...

the view from the top


annie, me n najib


the lovely fireworks




meanies
Singapore Fireworks Festival

how i wish my pwince charming would propose to me
under those lovely fireworks..*dreamy eyes*




najib,faris and me

The ides of March

ulfy, aisah and me


crazee floorballists




sue and yazid


me and najib

Teacher Lin @ work





my math learning centre


cute rite??? my favorite Chi Ya.


my favorite kiddie, Oiao Hui.

Happy Birthday Ulfy!

Happy Birthday to You!
Happy Birthday to You!
Happy Birthday dear Ulfy,
Happy Birthday to You!

Hey babe, you have exactly a year left to enjoy your teenage life.
Hee. So old liao eh. Me only 18 still.Oh yea!

Anyways, time flies. Without even realising it, i've known you for about 2 years +.
wellie, we've gone through alot together.alot indeed.
but no matter what happen,i still feel the same about u.
Luving u as always.

Thanx ulfy.Thanx for the friendship.Thanx for everything.

iT sUcKs

i might be mean.
i might be selfish.
but its for the team.
its for your team.
our team.

put yourself in my shoes.
being a captain.
u think its easy?
u think its for fame?
try it.

it sucks.
when u dont wanna cooperate.
i dun ask for much.
all i ask for is...
your support.

i dun care now.

-some people juz dont noe how to appreciate your presence and effort-

endurance

Been super busy lately.
mon-skewl
tues-skewl+floorball
wed to fri- childcare (thurs-floorball)
sat-my only rest day
sun-madrasah+wac his floorball match
apart from all these, i still need to prepare my lesson plans n materials for my 6 lessons and 2 learning corners.
*shakes head*
i'm so looking forward to 2nd september when all ends!
and to think i no longer need to go for attachment at childcare next semester!!

-trying hard to get my freaking mentor out of my mind-

missing my old childcare badly...

endure.endure.

loads to be done.

byez.

~it is still you i think about every night~

I want you to stay, friends, til the end.

Friends.
I'm sorry.
If I've left you.
In the dark for all these times.

I thought I was strong.
Strong enough to go through this alone.
But.
Certainly not.

I still need you.
All of you.
To stand by me.

Yes.
No one is perfect.
I should not have asked for more.
Coz when I met you, my friends.
I could'nt ask for anyone better.

I love you all.
AURA, I miss you all.
Really do.

--------------------------------------

i hate it.

when you think he's the bad guy.

he's not.

certainly not.

u only know the other side of the story.

n please dun pretend u noe everything.

lost the trust in u.

u blew it all away.

A second too late

I turned back.
Turned back to look at him.
To look back at that someone.
That someone who touched my heart.

But.
I was too late.
A second too late.

He moved on.
Moving on further and further.
Further away from me.


the tears keep falling n falling without an end.
wouldnt want to say goodbye.
afraid that i mite lose u forever.

------------------------------------------------

Menunggumu - Chrisye feat Peterpan

Di dalam sebuah cinta
Terdapat bahasa
Yang mengalun indah
Mengisi jiwa
Merindukan kisah
Kita berdua
Yang tak pernah bisa
Akan terlupa

Bila rindu ini masih milikmu
Kuhadirkan sebuah tanya untukmu
Harus berapa lama aku menunggumu
Aku menunggumu

Di dalam masa indah
Saat bersamamu
Yang tak pernah bisa
Akan terlupa
Pandangan matanya

Menghancurkan jiwa
Dengan segenap cinta
Aku bertanya

Aku menunggumu

Dalam hati ku menunggu
Dalam hati ku menunggu
Aku..
Dalam lelah ku menunggu
Dalam lelah ku menunggu
Aku..
Masih menunggu

Bila rindu ini masih milikmu
Kuhadirkan sebuah...
Harus berapa lama, harus berapa lama
Aku menunggumu, aku menunggumu...

That Someone Special

I thank God.
For giving me a gift.
A gift of knowing someone.
Someone so understanding.
Someone so patient.
Someone so loving.
Someone so caring.
and.
Someone who loves me just the way I am.

~you are no longer that someone who were there at the right moment,the right place~

Jealousy

Today.
I just realised it today.
Only today.
That I'm still not over you.
I thought I was.
But truth is I'm not.

J-E-A-L-O-U-S-Y

Maybe i am stupid.Dumb too.
To let you go.
To cry over it when it's all over.
I'm sorry.

But please.
Please.
Please do acknowledge me.
Please do still acknowledge me as someone who have touched your heart before.

I might be selfish.
Yes i am.
I don't want you to ever let go of the past.
But i can't stop you.

Don't let go of those memories.
Cherish it.Treasure it.
Keep it safely in your heart.
I promise you that I will.

-my tears won't stop falling-

Happy Birthday!

To: You

Happy 19th Birthday!

I miss you on your birthday,
Not only for your smile,
But for the piece of me that's gone,
Left within your care.

friends come n go

hurt.

i juz realised u were not the kind of fren i used to think u were.

now.
i can only afford to look at u from far.
i can only afford to smile at u without u looking at me.
this was not the way i want it to be.
certainly not.

hmmm.
got back from werk.
ibu,abah fetched me.
i asked them to.
y?
bcoz i wez scared to go back alone.
wellie, hear me out.
the other day i wez werking, there wez this guy who said this 'roti prata man' wanted to get to noe me.i juz smiled at him.this guy claimed tat the 'roti prata man' was his poly fren.n his name is jamil.yes.he's an indian muslim.n he's in his twenties i gez.
so today the same man came to my store.he said the 'roti-prata man' would talk to me soon.
*bites lip*
n he did.
he came to my store at around 10+.
i hide in the office wen he came.
so at eleven, as i walked out of the store to go home i saw the 'roti prata man' waiting at the corner.
*shakes head*
i quickly ran back into the store n told my colleagues.
they were all laughing at me.
i was freakins scared!!!
decided to call ibu at home but abg ngah said ibu wasnt at home.
feeling desperate i asked abg ngah to fetch me.
n he said ok after i told him y.
while i wez hiding in my store waiting for abg ngah, the 'roti prata man' came into my store.
shitz.
i went into the store room straight away.
called ibu on her handphone.
told her wad happen.
i was lucky she was already on her way home.
so tats how i got them to fetch me.
i got ibu to fetch me from the store room itself coz the 'roti prata man' was still in the store waiting.
he told my colleague tat he nids to talk to me to settle sumting.
lyk huh??
when we didnt even talk b4 this.
wen ibu n abah came in, he straight away went out of the store.
phew!
after wad happened abah told me to call everytime i'm comin back from werk in future.
gotta noe tat this 'roti prata man' is the owner of the roti-prata shop son.
hmmm...*scratch head*

you.
yes you.
yes.
i do love you.
missing ya too.
very much.

she was lucky.
lucky to have him.
no doubt she IS lucky.
but the love she had went away.
though she still do love him.
theres nothing much she could do.
she just have to pray.
pray hard tat they will meet again later in lyf.

the hols this time is filled with lots of activities.
lurve it.
first was bbq.
then cca fiesta.
then dragon boat.
then ubin trip.
all with my fellow floorballers.
fun.fun.fun.

ubin trip wez great despite the rain.
there were around 31 of us.
am i rite?
i think so.
well hafiz u owe us one story!
wads wif the covered well n the swing??
floorballers, did u see the muslim graveyard there at ubin juz beside the cycle track??
i didnt!
but thanks to hafiz i did.heh.
kae wanna noe y we reached the starting point much later than the rest?
becoz we went back all the way just to see the well.
it wez kinda far.
and poor shu ann had to climb the hill on foot n push the bike again.
hehe.
cute.cute.

satisfaction felt when i managed to cycle uphill with my bike.
hehe.
i didnt push it up.
take a look at my muscles now.
wOw.

we took the last boat from spore to ubin.
why?
becoz we dun want to wait for the rest.
but took the first boat back to spore.
why?
becoz we dun want to rush for the toilets.
the toilet at changi wez stinky.
n there wez no lights.
but its ok.
coz all of us were sticky n muddy.
wen all smells nice n clean.
we headed for simpang bedok.
yum.yum.
i had horfun for my dinner.

after dinner.
we played the zig-zag game.
a game introduced by the ECH beauties.
heh.
we shuldnt have.
coz yazid makes it worse this time.
theres a forfeit.
3 losers have to finish a drink.
bandong+soya sauce+my horfun soup+yazid's lozenges(yucks)+chilli+lime
ewwww.
n the lucky peeps were Najib,Rhafiz n Farhan.

Floorball's the way.
All the way, Floorball.

love you.
love him.
love you.
love him.
love you.
love him.

i'm sorry.
truly am.
for wad i've done to u.
trust me.
the love i had for u.
was real.

i'm no longer living my dreams in reality.

juz got home.
from work.
my partner didnt turn up.
my manager accompany me til 8pm.
watched amazing race.
woo.
i like it.
i really wanted the black couple to win.
it was really close.
n they won.
yessa!

i'm not in talking terms with my dad.
i'm merajoking.
urgh!
the feeling definitely sucks.
my first time.
who's not?
he wants me to quit floorball.
i never will.
NEVER.
he said i'm too 'bebas'.
i noe i noe.
if not werk, i will have floorball.
n he didnt like it.
coz its combined training.
with the boys.
wadeva!
*sigh*

You.
are.
a.
freaking.
psycho.
oh well.
the truth has set me free.
i'm juz glad the truth didnt hurt at all.
my friends.
i lurve you.
You.
nice try b*&^%!!
You.
know something.
wadeva You did..
it only makes US grow stronger.
*Destroy me if you want, but i wont allow You to destroy my beloved team*
some things are getting into me.
i dun lyk seeing it happening.
maybe i'm juz too conservative.
do not spoil ur good image.
for goodness sake.
you are wearing a tudung.
got it?

pWincEsS is bAck!

woohoo..
i noe i noe..
you all have been missing me badly..
asking me to update..
awww...
so touched!
hee..
hols wez fun.
werk.
floorball.
friends.
werk.
floorball.
friends.
if without werk i think it wuld even be much much better.
but i need the $$$
NP Floorball had bbq last friday.
Its meant for our graduates.
we had lots of fun,
Thanks to the programmers..atirah n shu ann..(n who else ah?)
i lurve the 'battle' thingy...FUN!!
n its been ages since i went into the sea at ECP.
it was too tempting.
i think i wez carried or was i pushed by my juniors??
then najib had to push me in the water n wet my tudung..
i felt so heavy! coz i wez in my jeans...
i cant wait for the ubin trip!!
Evryone pray that i can go k..
pray that my parents wuld allow me k..
coz my presence wuld make a great difference..
hehe...

dunbotheraskforme

great.
when she most needed ur support.
this is wad she gets.
everyone's pointing their fingers at her.
why?
why must it be that way?
She didn't want it to end.
but it wasn't her choice.
it was theirs.
just leave her alone and don't bother ask her anything.
she's not even sure herself.

-end-

it's the beginning of the end...
...
...
...
...
-end-
the
tears
wont
go
away
i'm
sorry
too
i
know
the
wound
in
my
heart
wont
stop
bleeding

Love me,Love me not?

The match today was great.
Though we lost.
10-1.
But it was a really good scoreline because the game was against Moosettez.
And to think that our keeper is not a keeper.
Well she's a player.
This was her first time becoming one.
Moosettez is the number one team in Division 1.
That explains why i'm happy with the result.

Anyway i'm in a sappy mood now.
Not sure why.
Thinking so much about friends and relationship lately.
~Segala pertemuan akan berakhir dengan perpisahan walaupun tanpa kerelaan~